People around the world have reacted to the global pandemic in unique ways. Some people have taken the forced time at home to complete ambitious projects, re-surface creative endeavors they had been too busy for, or simply revel in the unusual increase in valuable, all-too-fleeting time with family.
I myself rewatched every James Bond movie in order.
Those of you lucky enough to know me for a while may remember a previous blog in which I watched 80s movies and rated them using my unique Patrick Swayze abs system. (Coincidentally the last movie I reviewed was an 80s Bond movie.) While that system is obviously infallible, for this series of James Bond movie reviews I concocted an even more stringent set of guidelines for rating 007 outings. The scale remains 6 abs which will be awarded based on six Bond-specific aspects:
- James Bond: The actor, the performance, that je ne sais quoi each man brings to the role.
- Bond girl(s): Again: the actress, the performance, and the story (or lack thereof) developed in the film. Note: This will not be an exercise in commenting on their looks. They’re all portrayed by beautiful, famous actresses. If you want a “hot Bond girls” ranking, I’m sure Maxim or BroBible or some other site can help you.
- Bond villain(s): Same as the Bond girls. No need to repeatedly point out that Telly Savalas is gorgeous.
- Theme song: Not just the quality of the song but how it is used in the film itself beyond the trademark opening credits.
- Plot: Self explanatory and entirely subjective.
- Miscellaneous: Bonus points for creativity, casting, stunts, and anything else. Basically this is how I can create wiggle room for myself to ensure the final list is perfect. (Spoiler alert: it is.)
So in the coming weeks, you’ll be treated to multiple pictures of Patrick Swayze and, to a much lesser extent, capricious reviews of all 25 James Bond movies. (Never Say Never Again is included here … and perhaps shockingly high on this list.)
Our first review will be coming tomorrow. I anticipate zero controversy with this one. Certainly no internet Storm will be raging.